In 1972, an unemployed sheep botherer called Gary H Merton had a dream. He believed that one day it would be possible for pumpkins to fly. Oh, it was a wild, crazy, mad, mad fantasy, and all his friends told him he was wrong in the head. But Merton was adamant! He was determined! And, what's more, he was as mad as a fish full of Alka-Seltzer. However, it wasn't until he met the wealthy industrialist Carl Cockerill that his idea was to take off. Cockerill liked Merton. He liked his enthusiasm. He liked his dedication. More importantly, he liked his carefully worked out blueprints, so he stole the idea, made himself a small fortune and left Merton destitute and suicidal in a trailer park in New Mexico. To date, the company has sold somewhere in the region of four thousand Pumpcopters. They are used mostly in north western Canada, where that sort of thing is considered acceptable.
Preserving the nation's heritage
Reverse the 412 signs of aging
Quick Rod Stewart and Enya...
Chief Inspector Wilbur Violence of the Essex police force has been in the news.
I've been stuffing myself silly in dozens of top class swanky restaurants.
Mankind's fascination with his hirsute neighbour in space
17 February 2017: Paper Mammoth
09 January 2017: Cleansing Clay Mask
08 January 2017: Introducing the Petty Complaints Ombudsman Service