In 1972, an unemployed sheep botherer called Gary H Merton had a dream. He believed that one day it would be possible for pumpkins to fly. Oh, it was a wild, crazy, mad, mad fantasy, and all his friends told him he was wrong in the head. But Merton was adamant! He was determined! And, what's more, he was as mad as a fish full of Alka-Seltzer. However, it wasn't until he met the wealthy industrialist Carl Cockerill that his idea was to take off. Cockerill liked Merton. He liked his enthusiasm. He liked his dedication. More importantly, he liked his carefully worked out blueprints, so he stole the idea, made himself a small fortune and left Merton destitute and suicidal in a trailer park in New Mexico. To date, the company has sold somewhere in the region of four thousand Pumpcopters. They are used mostly in north western Canada, where that sort of thing is considered acceptable.
How to look hip and cool and trendy and windswept
An inflated slug is a happy slug
Bigger, Better, Faster, Now!
As of February 2012 The University of the Bleeding Obvious comprised over 300 pages. We realise this might make the site a little difficult to navigate, so here's some suggestions to help you get around.
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13 December 2013: Make Pounds
12 December 2013: Learn to speak proper alien with the galactic phrasebook
11 December 2013: Scotland Yard's Most Wanted
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