Reinforced Lettuce

 

Biochemists have developed a new titanium-reinforced lettuce, which is over fifty times stronger than regular varieties.

Thin veins of metal are interlaced with the leaves to provide high-tensile strength without compromising the plant's natural flexibility.

lettuce

 

This will make for hardier salads and can be used in the packed lunches of people with dangerous and high risk jobs, such as racing car drivers or stuntmen. It will also protect the crop from pests such as slugs and snails, as the reinforced leaves will wear the little bastards' teeth down.

Return to Archive 2

The Bleeding Obvious Prime Time Gameshow Generator

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2018 The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

InstagramFacebookTwitter
Promo Image

Barker Harris

A right load of dodgy villains, and no mistake

Promo Image

The Museum of Found Noises

Parp Clang Twang Wubble-Wubble-Wubble-Wubble.

Promo Image

Extreme Dinosaurs

Coming this season to The Discovery Channel.

Promo Image

Out and About

Visit the Toast Museum in Stoke-on-Trent!

Promo Image

Galactic Phrasebook

Become fluent in Venusian!

Promo Image

The British Gas Party

A party political message

 

Extreme DinosaursTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...

21 March 2019: Splosh

19 March 2019: Man Shreds Birth Certificate, Ceases to Exist

18 March 2019: CGI