Man Picks Fight with Pacific Ocean

Pacific Ocean

Unemployed welder Desmond Omelette, 42, of Leeds has been charged with assaulting the Pacific Ocean.

According to Mr Omelette, he and his wife were sitting in the Coach and Horses one evening, enjoying a quiet drink, when the Pacific Ocean walked in and started behaving in a loud and abusive manner.

Well out of order

"It was well out of order," Mr Omelette recalls. "There we were, minding our own business, and suddenly we were treated to a tirade of foul and insulting language.

"Obviously it had been drinking, but that's no excuse. I don't take that kind of talk from anyone, even if they are a major geographical feature."

Brawling in the car park

Police were called to the pub to find Mr Omelette and the Pacific Ocean brawling in the car park. Mr Omelette is due to appear in court next month and there is a very good chance that the incident could result in a custodial sentence, as this is not his first offence.

Only last year he was charged with affray after starting a fight with the Red Sea in the freezer aisle of a local supermarket.

And in 1989 he was cautioned following an argument with Mount Kilimanjaro in a city centre night-club.

 

 

 

Return to Archive 3

The Bleeding Obvious Prime Time Gameshow Generator

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2018 The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

InstagramFacebookTwitter
Promo Image

Gerald de Scooter's Restaurant Guide

I've been stuffing myself silly in dozens of top class swanky restaurants.

Promo Image

Core Competencies in Office Furniture

Are you qualified to sit on a chair?

Promo Image

Emergency Kebabs

Acclaim for new venture.

Promo Image

Sandwich Advisor

Find your perfect sandwich

Promo Image

Brick II

The latest in home entertainment

Promo Image

Traffic Watch

The latest local information

 

Extreme DinosaursTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...

18 July 2019: Because...Kittens

21 March 2019: Splosh

19 March 2019: Man Shreds Birth Certificate, Ceases to Exist

www.bleeding-obvious.co.uk
Copyright ©