The Sandwich: #108

The Sandwich


I have been taken to a police station, walloped with a truncheon and then cautioned. The policeman said "Watch it" then walloped me again. I am now covered in shame and bruises, not to mention fag ends and doggy do, and I have been banned from crawling along in the street on the trail of buses. So, if I want to find the bus that my sandwich was on, I would have to adopt other ways. Fortunately there is more than one way to skin a cat. Unfortunately, I'm not trying to skin a cat, I'm looking for a bus, so I think that you are very silly for bringing the cat into this.

Down to some detective work then, but before I started doing my detecting, I would need some proper detecting clobber. I bought a pipe, a magnifying glass and a silly hat. I would also need some sort of gimmick, like all the proper detectives do. Like, I would have to have a silly voice, or a dirty habit or a catchphrase. I decided that a catchphrase would be bestest, so I adopted the phrase, "Blimey oh crikey, Pedro, I think we're onto something!" This meant I would also need a sidekick called Pedro who I could say it to. I found a man in a fishmonger's who wasn't doing anything. He said his name was Derek, or something, but from now on I would call him Pedro, and I bought him a dirty raincoat and a pair of slippers. Now, everything was in place and we were ready to detect!



Acclaim for new venture.
Prof Moonbeam invents new kind of fan.
I've always thought that the best way of staying alive is 'not to die'.
This week we look at Tourettes
Beware bedding-based scams
Mary Walters makes a breakthrough
Nuns to be installed in post offices.
We open your jars for you!
Our hirsute neighbour in space
Two Bongs from a Gong and Three quick ding-dongs in the night


Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs


The Bleeding Obvious Prime Time Gameshow Generator

Latest blog entries...