Your honesty is commendable.   So, you believe yourself to be monstrously deformed - and, to be fair, you're most probably right.  You're better off inside your bucket.  It may not be pleasant for you, it may not be healthy, but at least it will give the rest of us a break.  And these days there are a number of ways that bucket-wearers can improve their quality of life.  Many modern buckets come with cable TV, air conditioning and state-of-the-art alarm systems to deter would-be bucket piracy.  I can personally recommend a company called Bongo Buckets of Halifax.  I am not personally connected with the company (although it has been remarked that their CEO looks remarkably like me in a pair of thick spectacles and a false beard) but I have been told that they currently offer some of the best luxury buckets that money can buy.  You can be the envy of all your friends with a Bongo Bucket!  Oh yes.