The Sandwich: #96

The Sandwich

#96

Turns out that there is already a band called Deep Purple and they are massively litigious. This is a shame since we have already had all the posters printed and ordered the merchandise, including all the pens and baseball caps and trolley tokens and things. Instead, we have decided to call ourselves The Fly By Night Jazz Merchants, which means that we have to go all round the country, crossing out 'Deep Purple' on all our posters and writing out the new name in felt tip. When I say 'we', I mean me and Sniffy Pickles. Itchy MacGyver has to stay in the meerkat burrow, drinking fizzy pop and eating custard creams. He says this is because he is our de facto manager and he is required to stay by the phone in case we get an important booking.

Two problems with that. Firstly, I don't think I actually own a 'de facto', don't even know what one would look like, but I am pretty sure that I have never asked Itchy to manage it. Secondly, we don't have a phone. Of course, we can't really say anything, since as soon as we open our mouths to protest, Itchy hits us with a plank.

Still, the poster campaign was going well and it's good to get out and about. I got as far as Norwich before my felt tip ran out, but Itchy FedExed me a new one and I was soon able to carry on. This one is green, but it doesn't taste as nice as the old one. I have noticed that a lot of the time, someone has already scribbled on our posters before us. At first, I thought that this was other bands trying to get in on our act, but some of the words don't really sound like the names of other groups. In fact, they are more like the naughty words that you sometimes hear on the telly. I don't like to repeat them here, but they are things like 'bum', only much much worse. Anyway, I don't think that there is a group called 'Felch'.

 

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