The Museum


The National Key Museum!

 

There's something for everyone at the National Key Museum! Mum! Dad! Kids! There's fun for the whole family! And we've got keys!

 

Nestling in the picturesque rolling hills of Lowestoft, the National Key Museum is a delightful 4.5-acre family site - which the Health and Safety Executive has now declared safe, since the unfortunate incident in 2004!

Here you can relax and enjoy an exceptionally high standard of accommodation as you explore the rich and fascinating history of Keys!

We now have new modern toilets, separate showers and baby changing facilities, and there's been no fresh outbreak of cholera since 2002!

 

Visit our museum of keys, with its many interactive displays! Spend an afternoon in our theme park: dare you ride 'The Locksmith', Lowestoft's biggest rollercoaster!

Or why not simply relax in our award winning tea-rooms, overlooking the magnificent parklands which teem with herds of free-range hedgehogs!

 

Why not check out our specialist key wellbeing centre, and take advantage in the very latest key-based therapies!

  • Individual Key Readings!
  • Get a health check for your key ring!
  • An introductory course in Tai Key Do: the ancient martial art of twatting someone with a bunch of car keys!
  • Group stroking sessions!
  • Have your back door key blessed by the Ascended Master!
  • Lock therapy and fob massage!
  • More group stroking!

 

That's all at

The National Key Museum!

A member of Harridian Leisure PLC, registered office: 12A Plymouth Avenue, Portsmouth PL1 WDD!

 

Return to Archive 3

The Bleeding Obvious Prime Time Gameshow Generator

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2018 The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

InstagramFacebookTwitter
Promo Image

Cosmic Background Apathy

In the beginning, it was like bang! You know.

Promo Image

Bing Crosby Boxing

Punching singers in the mouth

Promo Image

Unconventional Weapons

The role of water pistols in modern warfare

Promo Image

Thinking of Buying an Octopus?

What you need to know

Promo Image

Animals

Better adapted to eating chips

Promo Image

Post Nuns

Nuns to be installed in post offices.

 

Teaching Carrots to FlyTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...

21 March 2019: Splosh

19 March 2019: Man Shreds Birth Certificate, Ceases to Exist

18 March 2019: CGI

www.bleeding-obvious.co.uk
Copyright © 2011