Oh heck. You breathed in a little more deeply than I expected and now you've got a monitor wedged up your nostril.   Oh shit, sorry about that. Err... I know - have you got a fork, or a coat-hanger or something? A screwdriver - yes, that's perfect! Now listen, here's what I want you to do. There's no need to worry, it's just a bit of do-it-yourself home surgery. I do this kind of thing with my patients all the time, and their relatives hardly ever sue me. I want you to brace yourself against something solid - a hefty table, or a refrigerator, or a small donkey. Then I want you to very carefully push the screwdriver up the other nostril (the one without the monitor up it) and try to lever the thing out. It might make your eyes water a bit.   I'm going to look away now, because the sight of blood gives me the screaming doo-dahs...
...Okay, did it work?