Retroactive Sackings

A new precedent has this week been set in the field of employment law as a UK-based firm won the right to retroactively sack a quarter of its workforce.

The company, which presently cannot be named for hygiene reasons, is a manufacturer and retailer of cheap leisurewear and has a reputation for harsh and questionable employment practices which frequently test the limits of legality. For instance, the firm has been able to pay considerably less than the living wage by claiming variously that it is a religion, a commune and an offshore windfarm. More recently it successfully defended an HMRC prosecution by offering expert testimony that the company as a physical entity did not exist and was merely a mental construct brought into being by the collective consciousness of its workforce.

This latest action came about after the firm posted considerable pre-tax profits which were, in their own words, not nearly enough. To rectify this shameful situation, directors decided to slash the wage bill by terminating the contracts of 25% of its employees, backdating their dismissal to 1997 and beginning immediate action to recover overpayments of salary.

Following a controversial ruling that the company had not acted outside the law, a spokesman for the government, who cannot be named for operational reasons, praised the firm's entrepreneurial spirit. "This is just the sort of innovative thinking that British industry needs," he said. "I think that we, as a nation, should be grateful that we can produce companies which are bold enough to think outside the box, and I for one am proud to be a shareholder."

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2017

Taken from

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2017

Download for FREE

Or read it online here.

submit to reddit
The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Scientist Discovers Square Root of Green

Turns out that it's a slightly pallid shade of yellow.

Promo Image

Fengami

The art of folding furniture

Promo Image

Why your printer doesn't work

Most commercially available printers have an inbuilt fear of paper.

Promo Image

Jehovah's Cleaners

Cleaning whether you want it or not

Promo Image

Well Stuffed

Rogue taxidermist at large.

Promo Image

Highway Robbery

Have you seen these stolen roads?

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...