The UK's 7th funniest comedy site, probably

with Donald Fact.

Jazz hands and quickstep.

New Recruitment Initiatives within the UK Police Force.

Harnessing the mystical bollocks of the universe.

Where quality care costs extra.

Brought to you by the meat marketing board.

Frogtastic Facts

Europe's leading stockist of quality holes.

Unpublished Womble book is dystopian nightmare.

Because an inflated slug is a happy slug.

Skateboarding plesiosaurs, rollerblading raptors and a brontosaurus with a space hopper.

Guy Pakker's latest artistic venture.

With Ricky Stratocaster, professor of twangology.

Some of our biscuits may contain canoes.

For when your regular clown lets you down.

Punching singers in the mouth.
Words of wisdom from our resident medic

Professional donkey storage.

Our hairy satellite.

Curse fluently in over six languages.

When you absolutely positively need a kebab.

Fergus Pong introduces us to this dying art.

Particulate mapping of key delivery nodes.

Meet likeminded pigs in your area!

We meet an alien archaeologist.

The secret ways that vicars communicate?

Fry sausages with just a wink of the eye.

Important news from the Ministry of Tortoises.

Tick the box if you're a wrong 'un.

Making you aware of your debt.

Equestrian technology.

Major General Barmy-Phipps Discusses Modern Day Bird Warfare

Fear of a wet planet.

Raw unadulterated jazz.

Arthur's train only has wheels on one side.

There's no butter in it either.

A woggle for the new miilenium.

German U-Boat Found on Devon Beach.

The continuing adventures of Astro Cat.

For collectors of rare and unusual sounds.

Solving crimes and fighting bad guys.

A great addition to any home.

Nostril wigs for all occasions

MPs praise growing industry.

Slight wafts and uninvited pumps.

with Woodroffe Spanker

Most of these devices are allergic to paper.

Local frog trapped in drain.

Overnight corduroys and occasional dungarees.

Boasting Europe's biggest landfill.

Sending foreign gas back home.

Can you cut the mustard as a top burger executive?

Wise words from Shepton Bassett's number one coach driver.

Save cash - fix your own pets in the comfort of your own home.

Better management through crayons.

We've got keys!

Unlocking the power of curly hair.

Do you remember Puthering Day?

The magazine for young gentlemen.

Professor Wimple has a dirty mouth.

Piscine polevaulting and haddock hurdles.

Please bleed into the envelope provided.

Speed swingball and dodgem rallying.

Remembering the classic '70s kids' show.

Recycling the rubble.

A message from Det. Insp. Barker Harris.

Do you need to grow a beard? Fast?

How what why when who where and when? Hello?

It's a man's life as a modern store detective.

Skydiving without the unnecessary inconvenience of a parachute.

Theft of town exposed as hoax.

All the news that's local to Mr Henry Droop, Littlehampton.

The magazine of weird and improbable stuff.

The hit gameshow for all the family.

Pseudo-academic subjects and frivolous arts and crafts courses.

Teach your little angel to swear like a trooper.

Open now for faster, more reliable lemon exchange.

The gameshow for all the family

Scientific proof of the existence of cheese.

Britain's waterways need straightening,

Why can't these people just stay at home?

Will the universe keep expanding until it can't be bothered anymore?

How to behave right proper and all that.

Issued by the Ministry of Gas, 1942.

These buccaneers desperately need your support.

You like chips? You like lots of chips?

How to look cool and interesting at an angle.

Trading Standards warn against dangerously out of date clobber.

A handy guide to your new workplace.

How to resign digracefully.

Why not specialise in the colour green?

Your arse in our hands.

Where the toasters roam free.

Shorthand tigers and double entry hippos.

Cowboys on the line and bricked up tunnels,

Spruce up your chakras

Insurance for Astral Travellers.

Alison Perkins is a mad as a fish.

Is the missing mass in the Universe actually pastry?

An elbow shaker and a lickspittling mumblecrust

Rogue taxidermist terrorises family pets.

Sir John Wyndrell has never heard of his own company.

Your chance to buy shares in the Salvation Army!

How to stop it crapping in your in tray.

Tone it down a bit.

It's no longer ok to call Oliver Twist a twat.

Team bonding, goal setting and table top brainstorming

A whole new world of smells awaits you.

If you like sticks, well, we've got sticks.

David Attenburger's Wonderful World of Nature.

The International Toast Museum and other attractions.

The Right Honourable David McGog unapologetically apologises.

Presenting The Metropolitan Police Choir.

The inappropriate erection of words.

Gin, gin and more gin!

Heavy vibes are causing delays on the A52.

We never put a healthy wig down.

Breakthrough leads to discovery of new smell.

You pay peanuts, you get monkeys.

Mrs Lubricant wants a tidiery Britain.

The big noise in footwear technology.

Tired of hearing from ungrateful and misguided staff?

All smileytangled cockrock strop.

Relax with chickens.

Confusing, badly translated or just plain weird.

Cut out the hiss next breakfast time.

Significant quantities discovered in Mr Harry Frome

Prof Reynaud pulls a fast one.

As used by TV executives worldwide.
Ricky Stratocaster's History of Rock

The race to put the first sofa on Mars.

Probably, but we're not sure what.

with guest rambler, Rory Triffic.

The only credit card you can use after death.

A huge pie just hanging in space.

Two men, one drive, no prisoners.

Totally changing the way that people spong in the future.

Top notch swanky grub,

Talking crap in the House of Commons.

Get yourself a quality ass.

Special beauty therapies for very special people.

We're running out of apostrophes.
Mrs Womble writes...

How we'll all be travelling in the '80s.

Shepton Bassett Council Responds

Sorry about your monkeys.

If you've lost it, Chris will find it.

The dark truth behind the Belgian conspiracy

Get your jars opened by a professional jar opener!

Put paid to that firey bullshit.

GRRRRRR! AAAAARRRRGH! GRRRR!

Fun facts from the Fact Master. Fank you.

Mrs Stenchtrouser is planning an expedition.

In aid of the St Tiddles in the Font Restoration Fund.

Discipline over distance.

Taking the pain out of internet forums.

Where do nuns come from?

It's a Fact, brought to you by Crunchy Flakes.

Are you allergic to octopuses?

A bouncy little freak.

A sad farewell to the world's fatest man.

Vicars on the job.

These vulnderable mountains need your help.
Some more stupid than others.
With our motoring correspondent, Martin Carburetor.
How to spot a dodgy copper.
Get your wonky flappers straightened here
This day in 1956 saw the introduction of the first regular colour knitting patterns.
A bunch of blokes twatting about on bikes.
Troubled Hammer film gets new release.
Second hand space travel
Buying a sandwich is the third most stressful thing you can do.
We're concerned about Mr Pyle
Mr Zing is swimming from pole to pole
Glorious innovations and technical marvels!
Belinda Sommers reviews the latest production.
Prof Jez Moonbeam is laughable.
with Professor Timothy Bottom.
Rob Hammond will give you a spiritual kicking,
A packed programme, following that unfortunate incident with the fire eater.
Put the fun back into dinner time.
Better late than never, our town plan.
Classic board games from the past.
The very best in useless tat.
Outstanding achievements in the field of vandalism.
With none of the greasy aftertaste of regular monkeys.
One-Sided Dice for Fatalists.
With the Amazing Mr Ooluv
Because cleanliness is nexr to godliness.
Possible dwarf planet discovered in Tadcaster
Mr Sideboard is not happy about his exploding shed.
In memory of Crappsville's finest son.
Tomatoes, cauliflower, brussel sprouts and peas - collect the whole set.
Dick Smidgen teaches you how to live your life but better.
Caveat emptor, quo vadis.
Turn that frown upside down.
How to avoid the business end of a stapler.
Phony fruit.
This summer, Christian Bale is Mr Bean.
Giving your batshit insade complaints the respect they deserve.
Plant psychologist.
No nonsense advice from a wise old bird
A meal fit for a bed.
New awards for old has-beens
Featuring the Marvellous Undersea Kingdom of Colin Chocolate.
Delinquent decorating.
Prof Jim Spanners explains chaos theory
Bottom kicking for fun and profit.
Could you befriend a lonely parrot?
Trade in your unwanted dog.
New number has consequences for the future of the universe. And bingo.
Jesus Wants Me For His Darts Team.
Hello darkness my old friend
Selwyn Peach paints Elephants
We talk to a legend of the circuit
Fresh breakthrough in the science of colourology.
Courtroom confusion.
Want to know how much to pay for a Nigel Tomlinson?
Clever trout and erudite pilcards.
Just buy it, ok.
Fergus Pong has a shark problem.
Be a great Briton. Or get out.
Major General Barmy-Phipps Discusses Operation Growbag.
With the amazing Mr Ooluv.
A tale of oconker mismanagement.
Ants, ants, ants, ants!
Analogue birds are about to be switched off.
...but here are some of the unlucky applicants
Have you been slightly inconvenienced at work?
More facts from the Funky Fact Feller.
The millitary applications of sheep during WWII.
Mr Cravat is not happy about where they park their stuff.
Flying into the side of a house at forty knots...
Famous cavern to tour country
Sign up for a certificate in filing cabinets.
Bigger, Better, Faster, Now!
Your guide to the wonderful world of cheese.
Rancid Alan Grease and others.
Parish newsletter.
Mr Frampton is looking for somoeone to blame.
The cutting edge of vegetable warfare.
In an infinite universe, there is no limit to human gullibility.
The UK 's premier trouser experience.
The biggest threat to law and order since badminton
Emergency trousers delivered direct to your anxiety nightmare.
Knees of outstanding natural beauty.
How to look after your squishy friend.
Pastry related assaults.
Introducing our new range of children's books.
Learn to speak fluent pasta.
Publisher leaves pages blank to cut costs.
Pardon?
On the importance of staying on the fecking horse.
Great moments in science.
Just been handed a project but can't be bothered to get started?
A new era in atomic lunches.
Mr Clutterbuck has an echo... echo... echo.
Learn to speak Venusian!