A Local Businessman Writes

 

Dear Sir

As a local businessman and employer of nearly eight persons, I wish to express my absolute support for the current government's drive to get more people back into work. I regularly receive applications for employment from people who are fit, able, hard-working and enthusiastic. Clearly this is not acceptable.

What my business really needs are individuals who are obviously too ill to work and would pose a serious risk to their own health and possible a hazard to others if they were forced into roles which were beyond their capability.

Failing that, we need people who are workshy, slovenly, untrustworthy and incompetent. It is only right and proper that these people should be obliged to apply for the many many positions that are waiting to be filled and, like most employers, I am more than happy to favour them over more suitable applicants. Or, at least I would be if we actually had any vacancies at the moment.

Yours Faithfully

Gary Businessman.

 

submit to reddit
The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Shampoo

Buy it. Now.

Promo Image

Anti-Assertiveness Classes

Tone it down a bit.

Promo Image

Bing Crosby Boxing

Punching singers in the mouth

Promo Image

Cable Rot

Experts have identified computer virus that can lie dormant in Ethernet cables.

Promo Image

Gerald de Scooter's Restaurant Guide

I've been stuffing myself silly in dozens of top class swanky restaurants.

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...