Freda Time

Dr Caractacus Penrose has discovered a whole new way of defining time, which he has called 'Freda Time' after his wife. The concept is expressed by the formula

Ft = (E + n)2

which, as Dr Penrose explains, means that Freda Time is equal to the square of the time that Mrs Penrose has promised faithfully to be ready to leave the house when they are going out somewhere, plus 'n' - 'n' in this context is any number except the one you're actually expecting.

Dr Penrose has said that it is theoretically possible that 'n' could be zero or even a negative number, but he says that in twenty years of marriage he's never bloody known that to happen.

The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

The Domesday Clipboard

The clipboard used to compile the Domesday Book.

Promo Image

Jehovah's Cleaners

Cleaning whether you want it or not

Promo Image

Flyover

Woman demolished to make way for development.

Promo Image

The Licepummeller

Knock 'em for six

Promo Image

Pixie Guard

Eradicate the Misery of Pixies

Promo Image

Jaggedy

Mrs Lubricant wants to make the coastline less 'jaggedy'.

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...