Reverse Pyromania

CCTV images have provided a clue to a mystery that has been plaguing householders across the country. As the weather improves, many of us will be dragging dusty barbeques from sheds or rescuing them from beneath storm-lashed tarpaulins in order to enjoy an al fresco burger or an informal sausage in the privacy of our back gardens. But a number of backyard gourmets have reported that their culinary efforts have been interrupted by the sudden arrival of teams of brawny men armed with buckets, who extinguish their cooking flames before rapidly disappearing without so much as a word of explanation.

At first it was believed that these people were some sort of reverse-pyromaniacs, or possibly health and safety officials who were being just a shade too keen. However, examinations of recent security camera footage have revealed that the culprits are actually out-of-work firemen keeping their hands in. This revelation also goes some way to explaining several sightings last autumn of people 'rescuing conkers from trees' - presumably coming to their aid in the absence of an adequate supply of stricken cats.

The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Jehovah's Cleaners

Cleaning whether you want it or not

Promo Image

Zebra Scanner

Zebra barcodes assist conservation.

Promo Image

Not Funny

Jez Moonbeam discovers the joke particle

Promo Image

Nobby Wentworth's Pet Surgery

Modified pets for all occasions

Promo Image

How to Beat Stress

Maisy Donnington brings your blood pressure down.

Promo Image

Scientists predict the world will run out of apostrophes.

And we're running short of hyphens as well.

 

Teaching Carrots to FlyTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...