Stood Up

An Ayrshire woman has successfully prosecuted her boyfriend for standing her up on a date. The woman, who can't be named for geographical reasons, invoked an ancient law which first appeared on the statute books in the time of James IV, and was originally intended to help landowners seek redress when their sheep wandered onto neighbouring estates.

The judge ruled that since the defendant - who cannot be named for metaphysical reasons - failed to turn up at Glen's All-You-Can-Eat Grease Bar in Kilmarnock at the prescribed time, he was in fact technically feral, meaning that the plaintiff is within her rights to assemble a hunting party and run him to ground. Alternatively, she has the option of appointing a court bailiff to take walking possession of the defendant until he buys her lunch.

The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Out and About

Visit the Toast Museum in Stoke-on-Trent!

Promo Image

Cooker Island

Come to the land where the dishwashers roam free

Promo Image

North Yorkshire's Got Talented Traffic Wardens

Following the recent Bake Off contest to find a dinner lady

Promo Image

Digital Vicars

Ecclesiastical communication over distance.

Promo Image

Happysmiles Emergency Clowns

24-hour quality clown service

Promo Image

Animals

Better adapted to eating chips

 

Teaching Carrots to FlyTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...