Job Profile

Job Title: Financial Director

Department: Revolvement

About the Company

Frisbee Digitally Tracked Logistical Interface Solutions is a great place to work! The emphasis here is on fun, fun, fun. We don't take ourselves seriously and we don't expect anyone else to either.

Employees of Frisbee Digitally Tracked Logistical Interface Solutions enjoy a full package of staff activities including paintballing, crazy golf, greyhound racing, arts and crafts, and much, much more. After all that it's a wonder that there's any time left to get the job done. Actually, there usually isn't but we're progressive enough to realise that work shouldn't get in the way of team-building.

Job Description

You will be responsible for overseeing all aspects of the company's financial mismanagement systems, tax aversion policies and ensuring adherence to the firm's programme of corporate fraud. Probably some other stuff as well. Sorry, this all sounds a bit heavy but in reality there's nothing to it. If you get stuck with anything just ask Malcom, he's been here ages.

Of course, we wouldn't expect you to get the hang of it right away. Our head of human resources still hasn't got a clue what he's doing after fourteen years. Mind you, the prick doesn't know his arse from his elbow most of the time, so that's no great surprise. I'm surprised he's still here, to be honest. There's not a week goes by that someone doesn't lock him in the stationery cupboard. Maybe he just likes the attention.

Anyway, you probably want to know what the hours are. Well, we're pretty easy. If you just turn up when you feel like it, no one's really going to mind. In fact, most of our senior staff 'work from home' if you see what I mean. Now I come to think of it, I don't think I've ever seen our sales director other than at the Christmas party. I'm not even sure she still works here. Hey, maybe she's onto a good thing there? Not that I'm trying to put ideas into your head.

Person Specification

Skills and Experience



Ability to get distracted by YouTube videos

Willingness to bunk off early

Ability to turn up in fancy dress, amusing knitwear or silly party hats

Knowledge of popular films and TV shows

Proven ability in paintballing

Confident in the use of coloured marker pens, sticky tape and glitter

Willingness to spend extended periods tidying up and rearranging the furniture in order to avoid getting any work done

Related to a senior member of the management

Excellent Facebook skills

Familiarity with financial systems, legislation, procedures and responsibilities

Basically, we're looking for an unmotivated person who is happy to arse about all day, chat with colleagues and have a bit of a laugh. Candidates will be expected to give a brief presentation on what they think of the latest series of Game of Thrones.


Return to 'The World Bullshit Record'


Return to Archive 1

The Bleeding Obvious Prime Time Gameshow Generator

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2018 The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...



Promo Image

Operation Scorched Earth

Chief Inspector Wilbur Violence of the Essex police force has been in the news.

Promo Image

Celebrity Pizza Therapy

The latest celebrity craze.

Promo Image


This week we look at Tourettes

Promo Image

Cosmic Background Apathy

In the beginning, it was like bang! You know.

Promo Image

Massive Maracas

Mexican village attempts massive maracas record.

Promo Image

Caught by the Fuzz

New Recruitment Initiatives in UK policing


Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs


Latest blog entries...

31 July 2019: Glen Twerk is not at Work

24 July 2019: Goths in Gardens

22 July 2019: Rent-A-Shoe