Flying Traction Engines

This year's traditional Lower Brampton Steam Rally looks set to be a little different from previous years as organisers attempt to arrange a flypast of some twenty or so working traction engines.

"Getting them into the air is going to be a little tricky," admitted senior piston wrangler Kenny Spanner when we asked him if he expected any difficulties. "By and large, when these machines were first built it was not envisaged that they would need to leave the ground for any length of time, so their airworthiness has thus far not been put to the test. In many cases it is unclear whether the designs will generate lift, and attaining the speeds necessary to become airborne is likely to push many of the components beyond their engineering tolerances."

At this point, Mr Spanner rubbed his chin thoughtfully, gazed at the ground and muttered, "Some kind of ramp might be required."

Promptly emerging from this brief reverie, he suddenly appeared to be more optimistic. "On the other hand," he added brightly, "the sight of a hundred tons of iron and steel careering wildly through the skies in loose formation is one that I for one will find it difficult to forget in a hurry, and for that reason, if for no other, I for one am going to have a thumping good go at making it happen."

The Annual 2018

FREE!

The University of the Bleeding Obvious Annual 2018

Download PDF Version

Read online

Books and Free Downloads

The UBO Annual 2017 The UBO Annual 2016 The UBO Annual 2015 The History of Rock The Bongo Lectures Kicking and Screaming Dead Peasants Recalled to Life UBO Volume 1 UBO Volume 2 Death Doom and Disaster Goldilocks and the Free Bears Find out more...


 

 

Promo Image

Exotic Cheeses of the World

Some of the cheeses detailed may be entirely fictitious.

Promo Image

What Are Squirrels Made Of?

If cows are made of beef and pigs are made of bacon, what are squirrels made of?

Promo Image

Bongo's Books

Selections from Dr Bongo's dazzling literary career

Promo Image

Doodle

All your doodling done professionally.

Promo Image

What is Soil Made Of?

If mountains are made of rocks and oceans are made of rain, what is soil made of?

Promo Image

Oompah

Traditional Oompah music under threat.

 

Standard British NunsTeaching Carrots to FlyStandard British NunsExtreme Dinosaurs

 

Latest blog entries...